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iza got no jive

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quiet time [Feb. 22nd, 2006|02:08 pm]
iza got no jive
christine and i are like an old married couple. last night, we decided we were both going on a diet, and this morning, we did crunches together. we fight like frenchmen, quite consistently, and it's invigorating to be around someone who doesn't just nod and smile. this last month has found me completely and utterly feeling at home. but, this last week...ahhhh jeez. i don't even want to talk about it. my car. my job. my HAIR. disastrous.

it was so nice out today, i decided to walk to brooks to get my film developed. i knew there were some pictures taken at the housewarming party, but beyond that, i couldn't remember the last time i used my camera. brooks machine was out of order, so i walked to walgreens, and spent an hour there waiting for my pictures. some old guy was following me around, and he kept asking if i worked there. i think he thought i was conspiring against him, because every time i said "no", he gave me a look of disbelief. at one point, he ran over the back of my foot with his carriage. he didn't apologize. anyway, the pictures were interesting, to say the least. there were some of tina and my old kitties from, i don't even know when. those from the party were surprisingly...focused. apparently, i modeled my slippers.
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(no subject) [Jan. 21st, 2006|05:51 pm]
iza got no jive
happy birthday to me. on monday. 21st. it better be awesome. it better make up for this being the worst week ever. done. and done.
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sucka mc [Jan. 16th, 2006|06:14 pm]
iza got no jive
i've been spending some time recalling tragedy and all it's effects, and i realize that living isn't mandatory, i can stop at any time, but if there's any chance that my conscience will live on in the after life, i don't think i could really stand to be the cause of there being one less person in the world who owns total recall and actually watches it regularly. this is my greatest dilemma. see how great things are going for me? this is what i worry about.

(i am 100% delusional from stress)
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(no subject) [Jan. 13th, 2006|08:35 pm]
iza got no jive
i'm patiently waiting for you to kill me in my sleep. i hold my breath so that it will be that much quicker.
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(no subject) [Jan. 11th, 2006|12:15 am]
iza got no jive
i mean, it's really cute that i was using words like "deliquesce" and "meandering" when i was sixteen, but jesus christ, man, what happened to me? when did i become so less...literary? i imagine it was when i stopped writing.

nix on all past resolutions. time to start writing! time to score many, many books on re-building and strengthening the memory! time to find cure for damage pot has done to brain!
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(no subject) [Jan. 10th, 2006|11:17 pm]
iza got no jive
i figured this year would be a hell of a lot more interesting if i just took everyone else's resolutions and reversed them. i can drink, smoke, have casual sex, quit my job, hate everyone, buy tons of porn, jerk off every hour...etc. oh, and i can swear all the time, at every occasion. and i don't have to be nice. and i don't have to stop for pedestrians. and i'll get as emotional as i want and break things.

man, this is going to be one hell of a year.
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(no subject) [Jan. 5th, 2006|06:25 pm]
iza got no jive
everything is changing, and my only regret is that these positive alterations were inspired by carelessness. because we are not speaking, i'll leave you a written list of things i plan to do, and refuse to do.

at this point, i feel like i've done a damn good job of cleansing my life of it's most neurotic and negative attributes. at the same time, i resent the lives that i have been cleansed from for the same reasons. my new year's resolution is to resolve that resentment with understanding, and a bit of ignorance. i'll be honest. i don't easily forgive being forgotten, but i'm going to try.

in other news, my car is acting wonky. the steering is loose, and i've found myself having to drive more carefully, more "ten and two". anyone who's driven with me knows that i prefer driving more "five and cigarette", and while my running dream has been to drive my car into a tree (and survive with only scratches and bruises, but, oh! the dear car is in pieces), i'm going to attempt to travel without any major calamity. also, i spent two hours "playing" with my niece. i taught her how to yell really loud and slam her dolls faces into eachother. i called this "baby fights". she learned the phrases "terrible concussion", "severed brain stem" and "smash it harder". her pronunciation is outstanding for a three year old.
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(no subject) [Dec. 18th, 2005|11:17 pm]
iza got no jive
every night, i spend an hour trying to create the miraculous person i can pretend to be in my dreams, but i'm always just myself. i'm sick of my subconscious being the veritable fist of destruction to my glory.
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(no subject) [Dec. 12th, 2005|11:57 pm]
iza got no jive
mom's back in the hospital. job sucks. heart hurts. assuming state of triviality.
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(no subject) [Dec. 3rd, 2005|07:24 pm]
iza got no jive
well, slap me silly and stupid, sheepish and sedated, or just plain sober. i traced the path of demise, and i'm still confused.
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